How To Tell If You're A Grinch

Your only contact with three spirits on Christmas Eve
 is gin, vodka and bourbon.

You turn on the lawn sprinklers on Christmas Eve
 to keep carolers away.

You buy all of your Christmas gifts at a 
store that also sells gas.

Your idea of Christmas dinner is a
 six pack of beer and a cheese log.

You use your Christmas Club money 
to buy wrestling tickets.

Your only holiday decoration is a rotting pumpkin.

You reuse last year's Christmas cards and 
send them out under your own name.

You steal light bulbs from you neighbor's outdoor 
display to replenish your own supply.

After an invitation to a friend's house, you bring a commercially produced fruitcake and try to pass it off as home made.

You steal gifts from the Toys-for-Tots collection bins.

You put out last year's stale candy canes for children.