Things Dogs Need To Remember
The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
I do not need to suddenly stand
I will not roll my toys behind the
I must shake the rainwater out of my
I will not eat the cats' food,
I will stop trying to find the few
I will not throw up in the car.
I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish,
"Kitty box crunchies,"
The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.
I will not chew my human's
When in the car, I will not insist on
We do not have a doorbell.
I will not steal my mom's underwear and
The sofa is not a face towel.
My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
I will not play tug-of-war with dad's
I will not eat mint flavored dental
I will not use "roll around in the
dirt" as an
Sticking my nose into someone's crotch
I will not come in from outside
I will not sit in the middle of the
Suddenly turning around and
The cat is not a squeaky toy,