Got the flu?

Have some chicken soup.

10 Good Things About The Flu

10. No one wants to come near you.

9. You can legally take sedatives.

8. You realize guests on daytime talk shows 
have worse lives than you do.

7. You get away with being rude, 
obnoxious and surly.

6. You can smell like a baboon's 
butt and nobody complains.

5. You can shlep about the house unwashed
 and in your housecoat all day.

4. No matter how bad you feel, it's still better 
than how you felt after last month's tequila 'n' gin party.

3. Star Trek re-runs.

2. Your dog is allowed on the bed.

1. You get to pass the virus on to those you really dislike.